Hodgepodge Society Codename: Inflamed Peehole...hehehehe.

Hodgepodge Chapter: Not Affiliated with the Hodgepodge Society. Official Treaty Sanctioned MishMash Brotherhood Liason.

Distinguishing Marks: Upsetting lack of pigment in face. Silent film villan facial hair. Tattoo of Stephen Hawking jumping a bus.

Year of Hodgepodge Society Induction: N/A

Bio: My life began tragically and will no doubt end that way as well. I was born to a poor half-Norwegian woman in New York, who, upon going into labor with me, boarded a 6 train headed southbound from the Bronx to lower Manhattan. You’d think this would be the perfect time to spring for the cab fare, but my mother… oh, she certainly was frugal. Well, when my mother finally made it to the train stop near her free clinic and stepped off the train, she realized that she had already given birth. I spent my first 3 minutes on this Earth bouncing around in the leg of her sweatpants. I was the “Fruit of her Womb” in her “Fruit of the Looms,” you might say. And I was nearly killed during her traumatic climb up the subway stairs to the street above. The EMTs had to cut her sweatpants off to free me, and my mother was not happy about it, because they were her favorite “comfy pants” as she called them. She tried to make them into shorts, but she could never get the smell of placenta out. We couldn’t afford Tide. Anyway, that’s how I got the nickname “Hanes.” After that, there isn’t much to tell. I grew up and spent most of my life working as a poultry processor. It is tough to decide which is the worst task in a poultry plant -- would you rather be defecated on and scratched by live birds; slaughter and behead them; or pull their guts out with your bare hands?

Webmasters Note: And it just pretty much ended there...what a creep.

Zounds! Much to the chagrin of UN sactions that are still held up in due process, the MishMash Brotherhood is on the newfangled MySapce that the kids are talking about so much these days. Go visit their site...if you dare!

Lieutenant Bradley Percival Hanes Stefenson's MySpace Page

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